Blaise Zabini (blackenedblaise) wrote in under_siege,
Blaise Zabini
blackenedblaise
under_siege

Who: Harry and Blaise
What: Talk and snuggle
Where: Third floor hall, then Gryff dorms




It had been... a surprisingly long time since Blaise had seen Harry. That occurred to him with a pang of guilt as he made his way through the hallways, towards the third floor where they intended to meet. Who knew why they had chosen there... it had simply been a mutual decision as a simple meeting place. Either way, Blaise had rather been looking forward to it. He always liked hanging around with Harry... as rare as such occasions had been lately. It always seemed to put the world in perspective. Perspective was likely something Blaise needed, considering his arm was still bandaged from the two slices he had put in it (which his robes thankfully covered) and the deal with Theodore and Draco that never seemed to end.

Since he was a bit early, Blaise stopped about midway down the particular hall they had mentioned, leaning against the wall and resting the back of his head against it. His eyes closed, arms crossed over his chest, simply waiting.

"You know, this is how bad things happen to people in films. They close their eyes in a dark and deserted place, and then WOOOSH, monster." Harry said into the silence, his lips quirking up in a wry smile as he slipped to Blaise's side. Shadows traced his eyes, and tiredness evoked every move, but there was something vibrant in that half smile. Harry Potter was never more alive when he was about to go into battle.

He slumped next to Blaise, dark hair falling into his eyes as he murmured, "You know, I fecking hate your boyfriends."

A small smirk grew over Blaise's face as his eyes opened, hunching slightly as his head turned to look over at Harry. Once the Gryffindor was close enough, his arm slid around the other's shoulders, kissing his forehead. "I don't have a boyfriend," he pointed out, even though he winced at the other's statement. "And what the hell did they do now?" Of course he knew who Harry was referring to. It was always either Theodore or Draco.

"Malfoy. He has intimated on your intimacy. I think I'm going to hit him in his pretty mouth until it bleeds." Harry said thoughtfully, sliding into Blaise's grasp easily. He smirked crookedly, pressing a warm kiss against the slope of Blaise's throat. "Of course, you'll tell me 'No'."

"Of course I will," Blaise murmured, sliding down to sit on the floor and pulling Harry automatically into his lap, second arm curling around the Gryffindor's waist. Affectionate touches came so easily when dealing with Harry. "He's only reduced me to tears like, three times in the past two weeks. That has to be a new record." Note the sarcasm to his tone as he rolled his eyes, sighing softly.

"...Oh, now I'm really just going to come up behind him with a chair and a death wish." Harry grumbled, allowing himself to be cuddled, resting himself back against the other boy. A boneless stretch of lithe body, and a long, long sigh. "What DO you see in him?"

"Not sure anymore. Fell in love too long ago to remember." Blaise's tone was only half teasing as he said it, resting his cheek against Harry's shoulder. "And if you didn't enjoy it at least somewhat, you wouldn't let him bait you like you do."

"...Mostly because I can't ever think of something equally cutting to say in return. My wits do not lie with my quick tongue." Harry protested, his long fingers diving into Blaise's dark locks. "I do not, in any way, shape or form, like Draco Malfoy. He's a giant git of gits. Superior Git. The Git-Mongeous."

"Git-Mongeous, hm?" Teased Blaise, laughing softly. Harry was just too cute. "Now I'm tempted to believe that portion about your superior wit. That was probably one of the most amusing... yet lame... insults I have ever heard in my life. I applaud you, Harry."

Harry did a decorous bow with just his free hand, smiling lazily as he stretches again. He sighed and tilted his head towards the other boy. "I just don't talk pretty enough, do I? I don't have their poetry."

"Did I forget to mention that I don't have a boyfriend? Or did that just go in one ear and out the other? We all broke up, Harry. As in... not dating. And also... no poetry. And since when do either of them quote poetry?" Rolling his eyes, Blaise held Harry a bit closer. "Prat."

"Not even poetry, you twit." Harry murmured, even though his crooked smile flashed bright in the dimness of the room. "I mean the way they can get to you - how just a few words can really reach inside and touch the way you feel. I can't do that. I can't get that close to you, no matter what I do or say."

Blaise quieted for a long moment, simply sitting there, holding Harry. When he did, all teasing was gone from his voice, instead quiet, completely serious. "Wanna bet?"

"...Don't exactly have your resources, Blaise." Harry's eyes cracked open as he stared up at the vaunted ceiling. "So I'll stick to low stakes. A sickle?"

"Likely not the smartest thing to bet against the person who already knows the answer," Blaise pointed out, nuzzling Harry's throat with a drawn out sigh. "So you owe me a sickle."

"I'll write you out an IOU until I get back to the dorms." Harry let out a soft sigh of his own, before twisting around, drawing Blaise's face up to look at him. Green eyes were flush with a serious light, and his grip was gentle but firm. "You know how jealous I am, don't you?"

That... was unexpected. Blaise's lips parted to say something, then closed, utter confusion written across his face. "Why... would you be jealous?" he inquired. "So what if Draco can smooth talk his way through everything. That's what he does. It doesn't mean anything."

"Yes, but you love him." Harry said softly, brushing his fingers across Blaise's cheeks, before rising to his feet abruptly, his lean features thinning with frustration and a little bit of pain. "It seems to mean something to you - the right words said at the right time. I just wish ... I don't know. I won't ever be suave, I suppose. It bothers me."

When Harry rose to his feet, Blaise remained sitting, gazing up at him. Slowly, he got up, brushing his fingertips along Harry's cheekbone. "It shouldn't bother you," he pointed out. "I've had people love me back, and I'm even worse with words than you are. At least you only goof up, I insult people half the bloody time. How eloquent you are doesn't have anything to do with it."

"...Then what does?" Harry asked quietly, tilting his head slightly upwards at Blaise, his eyes narrowed slightly behind their round frames.

"Just... the person that you are. I can't explain it... not in broad enough terms. I can only speak for myself... I don't know what other people like, what they fall for..." His fingers continued running tenderly over Harry's cheek, gazing down at him.

Harry let out a long sigh, sliding one hand around Blaise's neck to pull the other boy closer, leaning their foreheads together lightly. "So, explain yourself to me, Blaise."

Searching Harry's eyes for a brief moment, Blaise leaned in, pressing their lips together softly, tenderly. It was a brief, chaste kiss, but it got the point he wished across. "It doesn't matter," he whispered.

Harry exhaled slowly. before bringing his other hand up unto Blaise's shoulder, pulling the boy to him, against his lips, hard and desperate and very very pointed. If he couldn't say it in words, well, he learned long ago how to say it in actions.

Just as abruptly he pulled away, releasing Blaise and moving over to the window. He slumped against it, jaw tight. "It matters. It matters to me."

Blaise groaned softly as all at once Harry was against him, kissing him... telling something that he was already oh too afraid of. When Harry pulled away, Blaise was left standing there dumbly, though soon enough moved up towards Harry and slid up behind him, arms closing around his waist.

"It doesn't," he whispered. "Because I already like you, Harry. I already care about you and I already want you..." His body curled just slightly, holding Harry in against him protectively. "I already know how easily I could fall in love with you. But I won't let that happen..."

"Because of Malfoy." Harry said quietly, closing hi eyes against the warmth of Blaise's body. God, why did that ferret have to be right about this? He could be right about anything at all - but he HAD to be right about this. "Because you're tired of hurting whatever you love."

Blaise shook his head firmly, holding Harry a bit tighter against him. He turned just enough to brush his lips over the smaller boy's scar, tongue darting out tenderly. "This has nothing to do with Draco," he pointed out.

Harry let out a low shudder at that, his hands gripping down on Blaise's arms before he twisted around to face Blaise, his expression a study in angry frustration. "Then what? What does it have to deal with, Blaise? If it's not him, and it's not Nott, and god knows it's not me, then what? Snape? Someone else?"

Blaise's eyes bore straight into the green of Harry's, his expression as meaningful as any Slytherin's could be. "This isn't about anyone but you and I, Harry. And I won't do that to you."

Harry's frustration only grew at that, and he tried to move away. "I don't understand what the hell the problem is, Blaise. I just don't."

There was no way Blaise was letting Harry move away from him. Not at this point. His hand quickly flew up, seizing the Gryffindor around the chin, gaze holding. "Listen to me, Harry. I care about you. I care about you a great deal. You aren't like anyone I've ever met... and even though you seem to think otherwise... you can get under my skin like nothing. When you're around, all I want is you in my arms, snuggling, or joking around, or whatever. You make me smile, and you make me feel genuinely happy. But look at what I've done to you. Look at just the little bit that we've done has caused. You look like you haven't slept in nights... you and Draco are bickering constantly. Fuck, Harry, you worry about me and we both know it. And you're one of those people that feels they just have to protect the world... and you can't keep me safe from myself. You would never be able to. And I know full well just how much that would crush your spirit in time. I'm a lost cause, and you can't save me. And I won't fucking drag you down with me."

"..You think it's all you that isn't causing me to sleep?" Harry's smile was tired, edged with pain and a little bit of irony. "You're not the only thing that keeps me up nights, Zabini." He sighed as he tore his eyes away. "And I know all this. I know it. But I can't turn my feelings off like a switch - I'm not built that way. I can't just ... leave you because you're 'bad for me'. If I did that I wouldn't have any friends at all."

Moving forward, Blaise gathered Harry up into his arms, cradling the boy. "You've never seen it," he whispered. "I know I'm far from the only thing that haunts you... but you've never seen me lose it, Harry. I wouldn't wish the hurt that I see in Draco's eyes when he sees me cut... You have so much of your own suffering, and all I want to do is take it away, but all I would be able to do is give you worse."

"...stop it ... just stop." Harry breathed out softly, pushing his way free again. "If you don't want me near you, Blaise, if this is the only way you can keep me from being hurt, then stop drawing me in. Stop making me love you despite your better judgment." He sighed, raking his hands through his hair. "Stop making me want what you obviously won't let me have."

Wincing, Blaise closed his eyes and bowed his head, arms falling back to his sides. With a soft sigh, he took a few steps back, and then moved towards a far wall, leaning against it and sinking down to sit. Only once he was on the floor did he look up at Harry again. "I'm so sorry," he murmured. "All I want is for you to be happy... I... couldn't bear ruining everything you have just for what I want..."

"What exactly do I have, Blaise, that makes my life so precious and wonderful? What makes Malfoy hate me so much? I really want to know that, at least." Harry's arms crossed stonily over his chest.

"I don't know why Draco hates you," Blaise admitted, chewing on the inside of his cheek. "But I know that you're beautiful... and one of the funniest people I've ever met. I don't give a fuck that you're awkward, or that you don't speak in poetry... You keep smiling and hold your head up no matter how bad life gets for you... and you keep caring for everyone around you, even though none of us ever did anything to deserve that from you. You're a rare thing, Harry. You're selfless... and people keep just taking from you... but you still keep giving."

Harry just stared at him for a long moment, before he took a faulty step forward, stopped, then kept going until he was mere inches away from Blaise. He gritted his teeth together, hands in fists as he muttered, "Then you ask me. You ask me not to care about you when you see me so clearly. Fuck you, Blaise. Fuck you, Fuck your fear, Fuck whatever happened last. Fuck it."

Blaise held his breath for a long moment before he slowly got to his feet, gazing at Harry. "I'm no good for you," he whispered, but even then he leaned forward, pressing their lips together all over again.

Harry gripped his shoulders, pulling him closer as he kisses him back. Hard, persistent, as if trying to stamp out Blaise's fears with his lips. He shakes him a little. "No, you aren't, but you can't just make me stop caring, you twit. So just shut up about it."

"Fine," Blaise murmured, pulling Harry close and kissing him all over again. Firm, desperate as he gave the other boy what he wanted... what Blaise himself wanted. He knew he shouldn't, but that simply didn't stop him at this point.

Harry slipped into the kisses for a few, long, blissful and heated moments, before pulling away again. He pressed his fingers against Blaise's lips, looking flushed but solemn. "You can't make me stop, but I can't make you love me. You understand?"

Blaise nodded slowly, gazing back at Harry. He kissed the fingers against his lips, arm remaining around the other boy's waist. "Just like I can't make myself stop wanting you," he whispered.

Harry's smile slipped crooked and rueful as he leaned in close to steal another kiss from warm, parted lips. "Ditto there. No way to stop that."

"Come on," Blaise urged, taking both of Harry's hands in his own and pulling him towards the door.

Harry blinked, letting himself be dragged across the room, his hands warm inside of Blaise's. "Ah, where are we going, then?"

Blaise's fingers twined around Harry's, squeezing them affectionately. "Up to Gryffindor tower, then your dorm. Where, bullocks to your dorm mates, we're going to your dorm, then to your bed, where we will curl up together and spend the night, and you will sleep in my arms."

Harry's mouth quirked up into a grin, then he laughed as he caught up with Blaise. "You realize they'll test me to see if I've been magically whammied, yes?"

"Do I care? I haven't done anything wrong, and I want to make sure that you sleep. That, and I want you next to me tonight. Whatever they think is their problem." Once Harry had caught up, Blaise slid his arm around the other's shoulder, keeping him close by his side.

"I sleep." Harry protested, even as he curved himself ever so slightly closer to Blaise's warmth. Not much, however. "Just ... have problems sleeping well. And I warn you if I do sleep, I might snore. We've never been able to determine which of us does."

"Silencing charms do wonders," Blaise teased, winking down at Harry as they made their way through the corridors. "Can't be any worse than Draco. For such a small little prat... he snores more than anyone could possibly imagine."

"...Oh, I am so saving that little tidbit for further blackmail. As we are both apt to do to one another." Harry smirked as he led the winding way to the Gryffindor tower.

"And he drools. Though if you mention that I said that he'll skin me alive." Again, Blaise fell easily into teasing Harry, pressing a kiss to the side of his head as he followed along, the Gryffindor being far more accustomed to this area than he.

"Can't have that. As I like your skin right where it is. All over your body and attractively too." The Gryffindor grinned, feeling a great deal lighter than he had been in days.

Wiggling his eyebrows at Harry, Blaise squeezed the boy's shoulder faintly. "I rather like it in place, thanks. It seems to suit me. And besides... I've grown rather... attached to it over the years."

"As well you should have." Harry glanced at him sideways, as they approached the Fat Lady. "So perhaps you should take better care of it then. You know. Preserve it for my tender mercies."

"It's still attached, isn't it?" Stopping in front of the portrait, Blaise smirked at her before looking at the Gryffindor by his side. "Shall I cover my ears so your darling housemates don't think I've poisoned your mind and can now get at you constantly?"

"Indeed. Nice and tight, as well. Don't want you getting any ideas of visiting me when I'm not expecting it." Harry said with mock firmness. "Turn your back as well, oh Sneaky One."

Rolling his eyes, Blaise turned around and made a show of covering his ears... though only covered them so they looked like he couldn't hear. Why pass up a decent opportunity when it was presented to you? Besides, Harry would never mind him appearing in his room.

Harry eyed Blaise's back carefully, before leaning over to whisper the password to the Fat Lady. Why take any chances? As it stood, he wasn't about to pull another Neville. Hmmm - perhaps talk to Professor McGonagall about changing the password again ... "There we are, door open. And it looks like we're in luck - it's empty."

Blaise turned back around. So Harry wasn't going to trust him that much. Interesting. His arm slid around the other boy's waist again and he pulled Harry into the common. "Lead away. You're the one that knows where we're going."

"...Good thing too." Harry said wryly, glancing back at the door, before leading Blaise along. He heaved out a soft sigh. "Sorry about the whole making you cover your ears bit - but these are dangerous times. I can't afford the luxury of having you show up in my dorms whenever you want ... she could follow you in."

Blaise's eyebrow arched curiously at that. "What, you think I'm hoarding that bint around with me, now?" he said, honestly rather offended at the idea. "She wants me dead. I'm not exactly sleeping any sounder or lacking in the paranoia department because of it."

Harry's lips quirked up wryly as he led the way up the winding staircase. "No, but she has a charm that allows her to remain unseen while here in the school. She probably has herself polyjuiced as someone, or has some sort of invisibility spell. She could, quite literally, be anywhere."

"I'm watching my back, Harry. I'm not going to lead her to you." And that was all that Blaise could really say on the matter, falling silent as he simply followed Harry along.

Harry looked back at him once, saying nothing, even as they reached his bedroom. The only one there was Neville, and he was fast asleep in his four-poster bed. Harry drew the curtains around the other boy's bed, and then tugged Blaise along to his own. "Now, we sleep."

"Good. I think we could both use it." Kicking off his shoes, Blaise undid his robes and dropped them on the bottom corner of the bed, followed by tie and shirt, leaving him simply in his trousers before he stretched out on Harry's bed. Bandages still adorned his arm, from elbow to wrist, but they covered any signs of damage, so he wasn't concerned about it.

Harry frowned at the bandages as he kicked off his own shoes and clothes, but he said nothing as he shimmied out of his pants and into his pajama bottoms. Malfoy's words clung to his mind as he drew the curtains shut around then, and he drew Blaise close. Protectively, in fact.

Blaise was more than happy to nestle in close, arms sliding around Harry to hold him, nuzzling in against his neck before kissing his forehead and pulling the covers up atop them. "Sleep," he murmured.

"Sleep." Harry whispered in return, smiling softly as he closed his eyes and burrowed in, if only for tonight, into Blaise's warmth.
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